Well, I’ve got one of my own.
BOA - short for Bunch of Arse.
Incidentally, that is how I would describe MEPs decision to mask their dodgy expenses by keeping an auditors’ report secret.
Who’s on Question Time Tonight? #BBCQT
9 hours ago
Tuesday, 22 April 2008
Monday, 21 April 2008
By God, they frighten me
AP reports that the US Army and Marines is recruiting more people with felony convictions than last year.
The number of soldiers admitted with convictions was 511 in 2007 compared to 249 in 2006. The number of Marines with felonies rose from 208 to 350. Included in the list are some with sex crime convictions and others with manslaughter and gun offences.
They all sound perfect.
Believe the Duke of Wellington said something about his troops being ‘the scum of the earth’ during the Napoleonic Wars. Not suggesting that’s true of the US military’s new recruits, of course, but it shows how difficult it is proving to get significant numbers of volunteers to fight a war on several fronts.
The USAF did not admit anyone with any felonies, but then they’re generally not getting shot at in Iraq and Afghanistan. Or less dramatically, anyway.
Wednesday, 16 April 2008
Gordon Brown - an apology
I may not normally be a fan of Gordon Brown and I haven’t forgotten how smug he looked when reviewing all those Red Guards in China.
But he has shown some guts and decency in providing some condemnation of Mugabe and his merry men. Now, that may be because he wants to make some sort of historical contribution before being kicked out of power, but that’s not really the point if it does something in improving life in Zimbabwe.
On the subject of Chairman Broon... what about his teeth? They look really weird all of a sudden, as if someone has been painting them white. It must be all part of his new, smily image... but it just doesn’t look right. It doesn’t go with his grumpy, dour Scottish mug.
Well done on Zimbabwe, though.
Tuesday, 15 April 2008
Send in the (very) Old Guard
Following on from yesterday’s post... BBC reports that two RAF personnel have been killed in Afghanistan.
One of them was a 51-year-old reservist, SAC Gary Thompson. 51 years old... People of that age weren’t even at the sharp end at the end of World War I, when millions had already been killed.
How bad can it be that blokes of 51 (an age when any civil servant worth his final salary pension scheme has probably already got his feet up) are on the front-ish line against the Taliban?
The BBC account is enough to make you weep... Johnson had five daughters, who he said inspired him to re-join the RAF to serve against the likes of the Taliban – whose attitude to women has always been atrocious.
One of them was a 51-year-old reservist, SAC Gary Thompson. 51 years old... People of that age weren’t even at the sharp end at the end of World War I, when millions had already been killed.
How bad can it be that blokes of 51 (an age when any civil servant worth his final salary pension scheme has probably already got his feet up) are on the front-ish line against the Taliban?
The BBC account is enough to make you weep... Johnson had five daughters, who he said inspired him to re-join the RAF to serve against the likes of the Taliban – whose attitude to women has always been atrocious.
Monday, 14 April 2008
Pay thine enemy
This is genius.
An Iraqi is accidently shot by a British soldier and he is awarded £2m compensation. British soldiers are immolated, paralyzed and mentally ruined in Iraq and Afghanistan and they’re lucky to get £100,000.
And they’re surprised there is a lack of volunteers for the army.
Rumour is several elderly German blokes are getting their claims for compensation ready.
Thursday, 10 April 2008
Jamie and the magic flan
So free range chicken hero Jamie Oliver is soon to be teaching us how to live in tune with wartime austerity (as recession looms, food crisis hits, fuel bills rocket, home-grown Al Qaeda terrorists blow us to kingdom come and Four Horsemen of Apocalypse gallop over Hampstead Heath).
Can’t wait. Oh for the joys of dried egg, coffee from acorns (or was that only in Germany) and cabbage on cardboard.
Then we can all nip down the Anderson Shelter for a good sing-song. I’d have recommended the Tube station for this latter purpose, but that might not be such a good idea knowing our fundamentalist pals’ propensity for blowing themselves up in such places.
Can’t wait. Oh for the joys of dried egg, coffee from acorns (or was that only in Germany) and cabbage on cardboard.
Then we can all nip down the Anderson Shelter for a good sing-song. I’d have recommended the Tube station for this latter purpose, but that might not be such a good idea knowing our fundamentalist pals’ propensity for blowing themselves up in such places.
Wednesday, 9 April 2008
Dewsbury’s necktie party
Yesterday I may have made some comments about Karen Matthews, who I may have suggested was a lying, cheating cretin.
I’m not necessarily going back on that opinion, but I have started - in spite of everything - feeling ever so slightly sorry for her.
Why? Because her charming neighbours want to lynch her. And probably would if it wasn't for about two dozen police being between her and them at all times.
The scenes outside the courtroom today were, to use an over-used tabloid word, chilling. The thuggish, tracksuited, portly citizens of Dewsbury were a sight to behold.
Funny that so many were there are on a work day, come to think of it. Must have understanding bosses.
And how come they're all so fat if they're so poor? Must be the fat gene. Funny how no-one with the fat gene was ever in a Japanese prisoner of war camp.
I’m not necessarily going back on that opinion, but I have started - in spite of everything - feeling ever so slightly sorry for her.
Why? Because her charming neighbours want to lynch her. And probably would if it wasn't for about two dozen police being between her and them at all times.
The scenes outside the courtroom today were, to use an over-used tabloid word, chilling. The thuggish, tracksuited, portly citizens of Dewsbury were a sight to behold.
Funny that so many were there are on a work day, come to think of it. Must have understanding bosses.
And how come they're all so fat if they're so poor? Must be the fat gene. Funny how no-one with the fat gene was ever in a Japanese prisoner of war camp.
Tuesday, 8 April 2008
House price shock, shock
Noticed the Evening Standard's billboard today said 'House price collapse shock' or words to that effect.
Shock? Who's shocked? The media seems so keen to talk us into a recession and/or house price slump that it isn't shocking at all.
Guess you have to sell newspapers somehow. Especially when you're losing readers to freesheets which, while drivel, seem to be what people are grabbing on their way home.
On that subject - why on earth do people insist on leaving copies of Metro and whatnot all over tube stations. At Old Street, commuters constantly dump them at the bottom of the escalator - despite announcements asking them not to. What on earth is wrong with them? Why do they think that's a reasonable place to leave a discarded newspaper?
Cretins, I'm afraid.
Shock? Who's shocked? The media seems so keen to talk us into a recession and/or house price slump that it isn't shocking at all.
Guess you have to sell newspapers somehow. Especially when you're losing readers to freesheets which, while drivel, seem to be what people are grabbing on their way home.
On that subject - why on earth do people insist on leaving copies of Metro and whatnot all over tube stations. At Old Street, commuters constantly dump them at the bottom of the escalator - despite announcements asking them not to. What on earth is wrong with them? Why do they think that's a reasonable place to leave a discarded newspaper?
Cretins, I'm afraid.
Shameless insight into underclass
Shannon Matthews. Could it really be that her family copied a script from Shameless to fake her abduction?
Sounds too much of a tabloid dream, but this is some unbelievable family who provide a grim insight into Britain's underclass.
There's Shannon's mum, popping out seven kids with five different men in about 12 years. The 22-year-old child porn dabbling fishmonger. The weird uncle slicing himself up in prison. You couldn't make it up.
Good to know where our taxes are going - giving endless cash to this kind of scrounging, amoral, ignorant cretin. And good to know that Gudrun Broon knows how to spend our money so much better than we do.
Sounds too much of a tabloid dream, but this is some unbelievable family who provide a grim insight into Britain's underclass.
There's Shannon's mum, popping out seven kids with five different men in about 12 years. The 22-year-old child porn dabbling fishmonger. The weird uncle slicing himself up in prison. You couldn't make it up.
Good to know where our taxes are going - giving endless cash to this kind of scrounging, amoral, ignorant cretin. And good to know that Gudrun Broon knows how to spend our money so much better than we do.
Saturday, 5 April 2008
Ken needs the posh vote
Interested analysis on politicalbetting.com about the London mayoral election.
In particular, how well Ken Livingstone did in wealthier areas of London last time out. Question is, whether he will manage to do the same this time. My feeling is that the Lee Jasper scandal plus Ken’s general attitude of behaving a bit above the law may come back to haunt.
Boris Johnson may well have more an appeal to the folks in Winchmore Hill and Hampstead than did Steve Norris. More old Etonian charm and less used car dealer blag.
In particular, how well Ken Livingstone did in wealthier areas of London last time out. Question is, whether he will manage to do the same this time. My feeling is that the Lee Jasper scandal plus Ken’s general attitude of behaving a bit above the law may come back to haunt.
Boris Johnson may well have more an appeal to the folks in Winchmore Hill and Hampstead than did Steve Norris. More old Etonian charm and less used car dealer blag.
Friday, 4 April 2008
Daily Mail bemoans spelling test
Interesting to see the Daily Mail blaming Britons’ inability to spell on text messaging.
Says the paper: ‘Of 2,500 surveyed, 40 per cent could not spell "questionnaire", 38 per cent were stumped by "accommodate" and 37 per cent were defeated by "definitely".
Around a third of those questioned were unable to spell "liaison", "existence" or "occurrence".
Other simple words which caused problems were "calendar", "embarrass", "library" and "receipt".
Two-thirds blamed their inability to get words right on the predictive text function on their mobile phones.’
Fair enough - but that rate of mis-spelling seems comparatively good. Only a third can’t spell liaison? In my experience it’s more than that - and among people for whom words are allegedly their living. Bit harsh to lay this all at the door of predictive text, as well. Maybe more to do with handing out ‘A’ grades in exams to all and sundry... without checking if anyone can spell.
The Mail’s list of supposedly simple words was:
1. Questionnaire 2. Accommodate 3. Definitely 4. Liaison 5. Existence 6. Occurrence 7. Referring 8. Occurred 9. Millennium 10. Embarrass 11. Calendar 12. Receive 13. Necessary 14. Separate 15. Cemetery 16. Library 17. Accidentally 18. Independent 19. Occasionally 20. Receipt
Says the paper: ‘Of 2,500 surveyed, 40 per cent could not spell "questionnaire", 38 per cent were stumped by "accommodate" and 37 per cent were defeated by "definitely".
Around a third of those questioned were unable to spell "liaison", "existence" or "occurrence".
Other simple words which caused problems were "calendar", "embarrass", "library" and "receipt".
Two-thirds blamed their inability to get words right on the predictive text function on their mobile phones.’
Fair enough - but that rate of mis-spelling seems comparatively good. Only a third can’t spell liaison? In my experience it’s more than that - and among people for whom words are allegedly their living. Bit harsh to lay this all at the door of predictive text, as well. Maybe more to do with handing out ‘A’ grades in exams to all and sundry... without checking if anyone can spell.
The Mail’s list of supposedly simple words was:
1. Questionnaire 2. Accommodate 3. Definitely 4. Liaison 5. Existence 6. Occurrence 7. Referring 8. Occurred 9. Millennium 10. Embarrass 11. Calendar 12. Receive 13. Necessary 14. Separate 15. Cemetery 16. Library 17. Accidentally 18. Independent 19. Occasionally 20. Receipt
Tuesday, 1 April 2008
Uncontrolled immigration bad thing, shock
Well, how long before Gordon Brown has another pop at the House of Lords, then? He can’t be pleased by the Lords’ committee suggesting today that maybe unfettered immigration hasn’t been a great idea.
No kidding? Brown and his increasingly remote cohorts should come and try out the real world with the rest of us. Schools where the majority of kids don’t speak English, pressure on health service resources, shortage of housing supply. I suggest he takes a walk around Bethnal Green, or takes a bus from Victoria Coach Station, or tries to get treated in A&E in central London. He might realise that perhaps his policy of letting in all and sundry might not be such a good thing for the majority of us.
And could Broon have less charisma? His comments today on Harriet Harperson’s Peckham flak jacket had to be heard to be believed. Wooden to the point of being a table.
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